Inside Beasts

BAM! You see those two pics below. One, Two, Buckle a shoe — Two free pdfs. Does this mean you’ll like them? I have no fuckin’ clue but I spent my sweat, tears and someone else’s bloody insides to write it on my wall before I realized they should be pdfs and given away for free to awesome people. Say thanks to good ol’ Mr. Henkins. He died bravely (soft clap if you are a mute).

CQ1 final                                     T5EBA PDF

So why sign up just to get these things? Good question but not the right one. The right one should be: Are you going to send me a ton of bullshit? The answer : No. Only bi-weekly emails unless I’m letting you know of something really important and life changing or I need some email therapy since I keep waking up in back alleys with no pants on.

If you happened upon this page on accident, then you have no idea who I am or what I’m about. You should be excited, because you aren’t going to find anyone else like me or what I do. I’m specialized in Awesome and Fuckin’ Awesome. Also, certified in a whole suite of bullshit things people get certified in: Horse Whispering, Dangerous Actions, Punching Old People, Punching Young People, Giving Wedgies to Kids, Taking brain-boosting-possibly-going-to-be-illegal drugs, Reviewing Shit, and GSD (Getting Shit Done).

And the longer you last in my gang of Status Quo Destroyers and Beasts, the more cool, free shit I’ll be sending you so we’re all ready for the impending Beastocalypse. On top of all that I’m 5% dragon. ‘Nuff said.

Welcome to Beast Nation…

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